Nonwords (and Misused Words) and Words You Should Never Use, Part 4 in a Recurring but Randomly Timed Series

Okay, I'll admit that this one is really about misused words, not nonwords; I just wanted to keep the series going.

Hold on tight as we now descend into the world of urban slang. Which is a bit surprising, when one considers the contrary definitions of urban and urbane.

Anyway, I often find myself receiving dirty looks, especially in mixed company, when I use the word hooch (or its alternate, hootch). To save you some time, here's the definition from Merriam-Webster:

hooch; slang: alcoholic liquor especially when inferior, obtained illicitly, or made surreptitiously

(By the way, it also means a thatched-roof hut, especially in Asia, but I've never used it that way, and who really cares?)

The problem is that people often confuse hooch with cooch, partly because of the term hootchie mama. Regardless, using hootch as a shortened form of hootchie mama should not cause looks-of-death, should it?

Which brings us to ... cooch.  A word that Merriam-Webster's unabridged dictionary thinks is a dance. Apparently, M-W is a bit above all this "urban" stuff. As is Collins and Webster's New World (odd since they all list the other C word). So we turn now to the venerable Online Slang Dictionary for help:

cooch: the female genitalia

Ex 1: She wasn't wearing any underwear. You can see her cooch in this picture.
Ex 2: That was one nasty cooch.

Ah, I feel better now that we cleared that whole thing up, don't you?

So the next time I say hooch, just remember ... I'm talking about some nasty liquor, not your woman's nasty. Get it? Got it? Good.