Fuzzy Math

“Pension has been a drag for a decade.” 

Jeffrey R. Immelt

GE Chairman and CEO

Investor outlook meeting, December 14, 2011

Much like determining what the meaning of "is" is, apparently "decade" means "next year," or in this case, 2012, since that was the year GE made its first pension contribution in 24 years.  Perhaps he was referring to non-cash accounting items.  Sadly, those of us in the real world don't consider those to be actual expenses, since no actual "cash money," as we in the streets would say, has to be paid.  

Never count out the white knight, however; the federal government is always happy to help out giant mega-corporations, with a handout attached to a highway bill, no less, cutting the cost to the company by $2.5 billion.  And to think, Obama claims to be a democrat.  He's just a career politician like all the rest.  But please, call them muses, let's not get tawdry on my blog. 

Oh, and the coda?  The heat of having to pony up some funds for the first time since 1987 was just too much, so the company chose to shut down its defined-benefit pension plan to new employees at the end of 2010.  Ah, that explains the quote above.  It's not fuzzy math, just the inexorable, never ending, spin...

Based on original posting at:  GE's deep pension freeze | Pension Rights Center

Spin Doctors, "Little Miss Can't Be Wrong"

Note:  Lead singer in video is not Jeff Immelt, nor is the girl, well, nor is anyone in the video.  Just want to avoid any confusion.  You might not have been confused, but my head spins like I'm in an Alice in Wonderland tableau when I read GE company quotes.

As an aside, the source posting (same as right before the video) makes a reference to Thomas Edison.  Not the nicest guy in the world.  Too bad this didn't actually happen:

Oh yeah, you can buy the stunning artwork above here.  And last but not least, the great debate about the genius scientist (ahem, that's Tesla, in case you were confused) and the hack who put a bounty on neighborhood pets and strays, then electrocuted them in public to show the danger of AC electricity (that's Edison, by the way), lives on:  Nikola Tesla > Thomas Edison.  Many apologists have come out since to defend Edison and his animal-killing ways (let's not forget that killing small animals is the first step on the slippery slope to serial killerism - maybe we need to delve a little deeper into Edison's past), but they've mostly relied on historical writings as their basis.  I'd have to say, having read a history book or two, that I have yet to read one (at least in the broader context of public education) that gives a true account of our country's treatment of its native citizens, Japanese internment camps, and dozens of other  atrocities committed in the name of keeping people safe, or more often, simply greed.