Why You Should Never, Never, Never Buy a Cal Flame BBQ, Cal Spas Spa, or Any Other Cal Spas Product

Located in Pomona, California, a few years ago Cal Spas decided to move beyond just making crappy above-ground spas, and into the lucrative world of manufacturing crappy barbecues and barbecue islands. Thus was birthed the excrement known as Cal Flame and Cal Flame BBQs. I was unfortunate enough to receive one of their little crap-mobiles with the purchase of our house, and it's been nothing but headaches ever since.

Somehow these idiots managed to put the gas shutoff valve behind a concrete wall. Nice job, fools—now if I need to make any repairs, I can choose either to shut off the gas main (a major pain in the ass) or I can daisy chain gas pressure regulators on top of each other (easy but stupid).

Beyond that, though, the gas valve system on a Cal Flame BBQ is so poorly designed that it constantly suffers from seal breaks that lead to gas leaks and excessive heating of the knobs. I know this because I once touched one of said knobs when the BBQ was supposedly off. It was, but the gas was still coming from the valve, and continued to burn. Ever try touching 900 °F stainless steel? I have—trust me, it leads to second-degree burns, at best.

But does Cal Flame care? Nope. They sent me to some dealer in Spokane who supposedly bought the BBQ from them. Funny thing is, that dealer hasn't sold Cal Flame for 14 years, and the BBQ was manufactured 10 years ago. Liars. Oh, the main reason the dealer in Spokane no longer sells Cal Flame products? Terrible customer service, and also trying to pass the buck onto dealers, even for manufacturing defects.

And finally, my BBQ was one of the first defective POS's off the assembly line, so to get people hot and bothered, Cal Flame offered a lifetime warranty. A lifetime warranty that, by the way, is completely worthless if ownership is transferred.

Even today, Cal Spas touts on its website that it offers an " Industry Leading 10 Year Warranty" on its spas:

Funny thing is, even for its top-of-the-line Genesis model, the lifetime warranty is nullified if ownership is transferred:

Come to think of it, that's not actually very funny at all. At least we know that people never sell their houses, right? Either that, or Cal Spas is being a little crafty with what it touts and what it actually delivers on. Cal Spas, apparently, likes to hide behind smoke and mirrors.

So, in summary, don't ever buy a product from Cal Spas, Cal Flame, or any of their other terrible little companies. They are grifters and charlatans.

Cheers.